Wooden Jigsaw Puzzles: A Comparison (Monday Musings 80)

ADDENDUM 5/15/21

After extensively puzzling with all three companies, Artifact, Liberty and Wentworth, I found Artifact to be, hands-down, the most fun of the three. Liberty and Wentworth are of excellent quality as described below, but don't have the unique surprises and rather odd shapes/whimsy pieces of those from Artifact. Liberty and Wentworth puzzles are a bit humdrum in comparison.

One of my friend's Artifact puzzle was missing a piece, and he wrote to the owner of Artifact who looked at the puzzle again, and was dissatisfied with it as she felt that the image was "overcleaned"... instead of just sending him the missing piece, she sent him an entirely new puzzle!

Creatively as well as in customer service, Artifacts is hands down the winner!

I've decided to write as many posts as possible, and titling it Monday Musings from now on, to ensure that I don't "fall behind" lol.

As another hobby to consider (to give your eyes much needed rest from all the blue light of video games) is jigsaw puzzles. I got into puzzles once again as my friend introduced me to the Wentworth wooden puzzles. I was so impressed with these puzzles because of the quality and the satisfying tactile feel when you put the pieces together, that I wanted to order some myself.

Upon visiting Wentworth's online site, my heart sank as the puzzles were rather pricey, though at $50 for a 250-piece puzzle, the cost/time is actually reasonable, as long as you do the puzzle a couple of times. Since I'm very slow, it takes about 2 hours, so if you do the puzzle 2 or 3 times, it's cheaper than going to the movies. So I thought of getting one, but then the shipping charges were astronomical, since it's shipping from the UK. However, I found out later that Wentworth often has free shipping to US! But not realizing that at the time, I decided to see if there are US manufacturers which will have lower shipping costs.

Therefore, I did more research and stumbled upon the ridiculous Stave puzzles (Barbara Bush-endorsed) at average price of $1000 (perhaps even $2000 as some are $15K), so this brand will not be reviewed. I then fell upon the much more affordable and reasonable Architect and Liberty puzzles.

I find that they are all equal to each other, so the puzzle manufacturer that is best for you is based really on your preferences and what you're looking for. I'll outline the differences between the three, in alphabetical order.

Artifact puzzles is the most creative of not just the pictures offered, but the many interesting puzzle shapes. I don't find the tired, drab images of known paintings, and boring, uninspired nature scenes, as compelling as the fantastical pictures including monsters, cartoon characters, and so forth that Artifact offers.

Although Artifact pieces are the most loose fitting of the three, the irregularly irregular pieces are significantly more bizarre and odd than the other brands, and therefore quite compelling. It's interesting to see how these weird pieces fit together, often leading to a lot of "Ah ha" moments. They're coming out with the new Ecru line which offers tighter fitting pieces with no glare design, but it's more costly of course. Further, the designs aren't as whimsical or fantastic as their regular line, so I have a feeling that I'd prefer the regular over the upcoming Ecru. Picture for me tends to be most important.

Artifact's Mechanical Griffin

Artifact tends to have the most whimsy pieces out of the three, meaning pieces that are shaped thematically. So a cat puzzle will have cat-shaped pieces.

The image quality on Artifact and Wentworth is better than Liberty in the sense that the images seem like it's actually painted on the wooden pieces. One of the Liberty puzzle pieces had a small peel, that can be glued, so I don't find this a deal breaker.

If interested in Artifact, I would recommend the Griffin that comes with a clever surprise (spoilers avoided here). 

All the Artifact puzzles I own are so completely different from each other (I have 4!). Other customers also noticed that any time you get a puzzle from Artifact, it's a whole new experience.

As for the Liberty Puzzle, it has the same thickness as Artifact (6.35 mm), but the fit of the pieces are tighter, so in that sense the pieces are better quality than Artifact's regular line, only marred by the fact that a piece may (or may not) have some peeling (it seems like this would be a rare occurrence), unlike Artifact and Wentworth. 

Liberty does have a lot of whimsy pieces, not as much as the Artifact, but more so than the

Liberty's and Wentworth's An Exuberant Success

Wentworth. The pieces are more redundant than Artifact, tending to be more regularly irregular, rather than the irregularly irregular shapes of Artifact.

The Wentworth is made of considerably thinner wood than Artifact and Liberty, less than half the thickness (3 mm versus 6.35 mm). The thicker wood feels more luxurious, but because the Wentworth pieces are thinner, it's the best fitting of the three. The sensation of putting the pieces together in a satisfying click, so it  has the most pleasant sensory experience out of all three. There are whimsy pieces, but nowhere near as much as Artifact and Liberty, and more regular-shaped pieces than even the Liberty.

Wentworth includes a rather lovely felt bag to hold the pieces within its sturdy box. Sadly, Artifact and Liberty don't.

If you prefer unique pictures, and thicker, peculiar, odd and whimsical pieces, I'd recommend Artifact. If you prefer an equally thick cut with better fit, and you don't mind more regularly irregular shaped pieces, than I'd chose Artifact's Ecru line or Liberty. Finally, if you want that tactile, satisfying click feel with nice bag, and don't mind less creative shapes, then Wentworth is the puzzle for you.

With these criteria in mind, Artifact is by far my favorite of the three due to the creativity aspects, leading to unique experiences that you can't get anywhere.

If none of these issues matter to you, I'd recommend ordering the designs that you find the most pleasing, because you can't go wrong with any of these puzzle manufacturers. They all cost around the same price, and Wentworth frequently has sales where shipping is free to the US.

For all three manufacturers, prices are cheaper ordering online at their websites:

Artifact Puzzles
Liberty Puzzles
Wentworth Puzzles

The How of Happiness Review

All You Need To Do Is Have Self-Compassion! And It's Rather Easy!

In training, the first thing we learned in therapy techniques was Carl Rogers' approach of unconditional positive regard for your clients. For me, he was the GOAT. Those who are suffering most likely haven't been given the love and nurturing they needed in childhood, adolescence, and even adulthood. 

Therefore, as therapists, you accept and support the person, without question. You accept the client, including their flaws, after all, everyone has weaknesses, no one is "perfect".

By giving unconditional positive regard, the client then begins to regard themselves more positively after being heard, accepted and supported, they begin to see that they're worthy. And, because they're worthy, they'll be more motivated to change - you take care of things that are valuable, which includes you!

For some reason, this message has been strangely forgotten after my training, because the concept of self-esteem was the fetish. To the point where we have clients write positive things about themselves to improve self-esteem. Esteem, meaning, that you value yourself for your positive qualities, and the more positive qualities, the better your self-esteem. 

Do you see the fatal flaw? When you start thinking of your negative traits, and we all have them as human beings, your self-esteem will fall. Also, what if one of the things you find positive about yourself is that you have beautiful skin, but as you age, it will "sag" and then your self-esteem will crumble. Or, that you're a kind person, but there are going to be times when you act unkindly (out of stress, we're all human), so that will also lower your self-esteem.

However, if you can accept yourself fully, warts and all, because you know that you're not perfect, and no one else is perfect, you begin to accept yourself, and in turn, accept others for not being perfect as well! Thus ending the deadly poison of self and other-criticism, that destroys creativity, inspiration, passion, productivity, and love.

Once you have self-compassion, you will be more motivated to act in more healthy ways such as exercising, not procrastinating, not being critical of others because you see that you're a valuable person. And if you're valuable, like all valuable things, you want to take care of yourself.

Here is the scientific breakdown for why self-compassion works, and why self-esteem doesn't:



How do you have self-compassion? The easiest exercise is to treat yourself as a best friend would treat you. You don't even have to be that mindful it's very obvious when you feel bad because they're such strong, obvious emotions:

Anger, stress, hatred, comparing yourself negatively to another person leading to jealousy and envy, criticizing yourself (which makes you feel down in the dumps), and so forth.

In this post, I will outline the steps with the best friend strat, and then give five very common scenarios when we tend to be really mean to ourselves, and show how you use this best friend approach.

BEST FRIEND APPROACH

Step One: As soon as you feel that sinking, negative gross feeling, stop and think about what you're upset about.

Step Two: Talk to yourself (internally or out loud) as if you're your own best friend, using this three step method:

• Best friend will acknowledge the shittiness of how you feel and allow you to bitch and complain.
• Next, best friend would say this shit happens to all of us, you're not alone, and of course you'd feel horrible, who wouldn't?
• Lastly, how can we move forward and problem-solve?

EXAMPLES

Scenario One: You failed a test (or whatever project), you then begin to criticize yourself harshly and say that you're a complete loser and a fucking failure, you feel dejected and depressed. You feel like crap and crippled to do anything, which is the signal where you go into best friend mode:

As a best friend, he would tell you, that really sucks you got an F (or whatever failure), that's crushing and heart-breaking. He will say that we all fail, Edison failed millions of times, it never feels good but at least you tried and had the guts to show up and take that test (or do whatever project).

How can we do better to crush that test? And then come up with solutions in terms of studying "smarter" not "harder" (i.e. Gordon Greene's "Getting Straight A's"). You get excited and motivated so you order this used on Amazon.com and thank your best friend for support. Your friend says, "that's what friends are for!" You then get an A (at worst B+) on the next test.

Analysis: We see in this scenario how your friend acknowledged your feelings of suckiness when you got that big fat F.

He then universalized failure, that you're not the "only one" in the world who fails, so you're not the "sole loser outcast". Rather you're human just like everyone else.

Lastly, what can we do to change the outcome? Problem-solve and act upon the problem at hand!

Scenario Two: You're too tired to exercise yet again, even though exercising a mere 13 minutes, three times a week, can prevent major cardiovascular conditions that lead to death. 

You say to yourself that you're a lazy, pathetic, useless piece of shit who can't even do something as short as 13 minutes. You feel awful, which is the signal to go into best friend mode.

Best friend would say, no one likes to exercise, why do you think there are all these memes about hating exercise, and there's this viral cat video where the cat's so miserable to even move her left paw!

You're not lazy, you're human and like all the mammals in the world! ALL mammals are biologically wired to go the path of least resistance since calories are so scarce back then! Pampered pets tend to be overweight to obese, and inactive. The goal was to conserve the energy and hibernate in winter!

You feel better about yourself. Then he'll problem-solve and say, just go to the gym as the goal. If you don't want to exercise, then go back home. Most likely what happens is that you'll end up doing the 13 minutes, perhaps rounding up to 15 minutes or more.

Scenario 3: Your boyfriend dumped you, and you feel anger toward him. You also start feeling that you'll never find love again because you failed in this relationship. You tell yourself that you're unloveable, hideous, disgusting and trash. No one would love you ever again. You become depressed, which is signal to use the approach.

Your best friend might actually have a girl's weekend at your place to wallow in the sadness Friday night after work. She'll bring 12 different flavors of Ben and Jerry's, various chocolates, and order out pizza. You process the breakup and she tells you that everyone goes through breakups, it's a part of everyone's life - you're just like everyone in the world who's gotten rejected, I still love you. You feel better because of this truth. Then binge on Downton Abbey episodes.

But, on Sunday night, after you enjoyed the binge and wallow fest, your best friend tells you that you need to work on yourself and get healthy. She doesn't want to see you wallow in self-pity for months on end.

She tells you to go back to your life, go to work, take it one day at a time, socialize with your friends - you may meet eligible men. Feeling encouraged and supported, you begin to get over the break-up and taking healthy steps.

Scenario four: This is taken directly from my recent experience. You compare yourself negatively to another person. You begin to think why can't you be as fluent, as on point, as passionate, as humorous as Dr. Ramani:



Your friend notes that of course she's on point, she teaches this stuff every day to her students so she has to know the material like the back of her hand. For these interviews, she most likely prepared these answers in advance, and she has done so many, that it gets easier and easier!

I then feel better and interestingly, I felt gratitude (rather than feeling down on myself for "not measuring up") toward Dr. Ramani for helping people avoid getting involved with a narcissistic partner in the first place! Avoiding these people who destroy and crush others' souls (a malignant narcissist can conceivably kill his partner), literally saving lives.

Scenario five: You berate yourself for procrastinating yet again because you'd rather indulge yourself by playing video games. You call yourself pathetic, lazy and useless because you can't accomplish anything at all! 

How would you treat yourself with self-compassion? This is what I would tell myself, using the best friend approach:

It's so frustrating and annoying to not get things done because of procrastination! In fact, it's such a huge and universal problem that if you go to Barnes & Noble self-help section, most of the books are on procrastination! Of course you'd rather play video games, who wouldn't? Wow, you got work to do, so why not take a short break from gaming and just do 5 minutes of the chore and then you can go back and play the game. Feeling better about yourself for not being the only person who procrastinates, you spend 5 minutes and then more minutes as you get into the task, surprised that you got the bulk or almost all of the chores done!

I consciously tried self-compassion at work today which compelled me to write this post.

It was the first time where I felt light-hearted and a genuine joy, feeling full-hearted toward my coworkers without effort. I always feel the irritability when I'm at work, and use immense amount of energy to be pleasant to my coworkers since I like all my coworkers.

While they all say that I'm very easy to work with and non-intimidating, it takes up so much mental energy that I get drained at work. Which is why I end up playing video games after work. However today, having self-compassion, I have enough mental energy to write this post!

Despite being stressed today, interrupted every minute to sign, to make calls, and having to eat lunch in front of clients, I didn't feel mental fatigue, only physical fatigue. (The physical fatigue was my fault for not realizing I didn't have iron or synthroid in my weekly pill reminder box for the last 2 weeks, as well as untreated sleep apnea, and not exercising for being so tired).

At any rate, it was a wondrous feeling of being light and having this outpouring of love toward my coworkers (I do love them, I just don't feel it often due to work stressors), that I came up with rather creative solutions for a family, that surprised even myself!

The trap of doing any other exercises aside from self-compassion - activities such as keeping a gratitude journal, exercising regularly, and the like, is that if you don't do those things, you start feeling bad about yourself for being lazy, and you quit out of demoralization.

However, with self-compassion, you start feeling better. Even when you get down upon yourself for having a critical thought about yourself, you can snap out of it due to feeling the warning signs.

You may even laugh at yourself because of the irony. You're criticizing yourself for criticizing yourself! But by laughing at that, as your best friend would (perhaps even teasingly saying that you're a dork, but that makes you lovable), you can regain self-compassion.

Finally, as you accept yourself, flaws and all just like everyone else, you feel a sense of connection for others when you see them struggling, and end up having compassion towards them.

This feeling of love that you have to others make you feel even better and light - no jealousy, no bitterness, just a wonderful feeling of connection. We humans, as all the researchers say, are hard-wired for connection, and people tend to depression when you feel disconnected.

With self-compassion, as you feel better and find yourself worthy and worth doing all these hard things. You become more motivated to make healthy choices, do the gratitude exercises, eat healthy, get enough sleep, eat fruits and vegetables, just from self-compassion alone. 

The love you feel inwards and outwards becomes effortless, love being the powerful force, empowering you to do the hard, necessary things that are fulfilling to you.

The How of Happiness Review

Is the MBTI Pseudo-Science?

After finding out my personality type (and more specifically preferences in the way I perceive and judge things) and finding the MBTI/Jungian concepts of cognitive functions deadly accurate, Google searches into these systems of personalities led to many articles debunking and criticizing MBTI and Jungian personality types as pseudo-science. 

On the flip side, the Big Five Personality Traits are considered scientific and verifiable. 

Indeed, taking the MBTI online tests, my personality flitted between J and P, and even after learning about the Jungian cognitive functions, which is more reliable, I still couldn't tell what my personality type is. 

For instance, I really couldn't tell what my dominant function is, since we use it automatically without thinking. However, it was obvious to me (without having to take the test) that I prefer extroverted intuition for sure, meaning when I think about things I like to come up with tons of ideas, sometimes not necessarily connected. So I'm definitely Ne. As for the other functions of my personality type, introverted sensing and extroverted thinking, I couldn't tell. In fact, in medical school, I could see myself thinking that I was Te dominant since I was on point with the schedules, even exercising 5 times/week.

However, when I took the Big Five Personality Trait at multiple different online sites, the percentage may change by a mere 10% or so, but it was always consistent, leading to the empathic idealist profile. This made me chuckle, since the INFP sounds very much like the empathic idealist.

So is the MBTI and Jungian cognitive functions psuedo-science? 

As I'm not a scientist, I had to go back to the basics. Exactly what is science? Science is a systematic way of organizing empirical data, that can be tested and replicated, to explain and predict patterns of the universe.

The scientist comes up with an idea, and through experiments and collection of replicable data, if the large amount of data confirms the idea, time after time, this idea becomes a theory.

Science is highly esteemed because you can either prove or disprove a theory using the same experiments, over and over again. You can also critique whether the experiments being used are actually testing what you are evaluating. Finally, can the question that you're investigating be measured in the first place?

For instance, supposed I want to prove my idea that cats are superior beings, and because I want to make sure this idea is in fact true, I could "make up"an experiment that really doesn't test that idea, but may "sound" like it does.

In this example, we can say that superior beings don't follow instructions and "do their own thing" since they don't follow the herd. Therefore, my experiment collects data in calling my cat to come to me. They stare blankly at me 100% of the time. We then test that with millions of other cats, and it tends to be true 99% of the time with 5 billion collection points. 

There are the rare cats that do know their names and even so, they may or may not come to their owners (only when they want to), proving even more strongly that cats are "superior" because they do what they want to do, when they want to, on their own terms.

Per scientific methods, this is trash. One, you can't measure if something is in fact superior (i.e. what is superior? how do you measure that?), and the experiment, while easily replicable, doesn't really measure anything.

Using these criteria, the MBTI test itself isn't valid because your personality type constantly changes even when you take the same test twice - I took the official MBTI two times and then the online ones so many times to figure out if I were a J versus P as discussed here.

Even the official MBTI test is problematic. In the typing of Stephen Colbert, who tested as an INFP, you saw how his eyes lit up (which mine did as well) when the tester asked if he's more attracted to witty, creative, imaginative, incisive wit (this is supposed to be "N" or intuition), or if you find someone who can make others comfortable in practical ways ("S" or sensory):



As soon as I heard the second choice, I chose the "wrong" answer for my type. I'm infinitely more impressed by people who make sure that when you come into their homes, that you're warm and toasty, making your favorite cheese and fruit platter, and providing your favorite matching wine.

In fact, almost everyone would be more impressed by someone who is thoughtful and kind, over someone who is "just" a "smart ass". Of course, ideally, someone like my best friend Todd has both where he would combine various statements I would make and instantly come up with a joke, parody, imitation in unexpected surprising ways, but also makes sure that I'm cozy, comfortable and taken care of.

However, if you're forced to be in a relationship with someone who can only have 1 trait, 100% of people would chose the "S" option.

A better way of seeing if someone is an N or S is by asking if they think about things by considering open-ended possibilities (N), or seeing things in a structured, logical systematic manner (S). I'm very "N" so I'm not sure if I used the correct wording for "S" types and how they think.

Indeed, even the much-touted, "psychologist approved" Big Five Personality Traits, you can come up with your wrong personality type. You may notice that it's not "good" to be neurotic and irritable (even if you are) and then answer the questions where you get strongly "agreeable" when you should have scored the opposite, in the high neuroticism range.

In other words, it's hard to measure personality, because the person may second-guess, or may not know themselves very well, making personality inventory testing problematic. Even more highly tauted "psychologist approved" tests such as the MMPI (Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory,  though that is used to screen mental disorders) can be problematic.

You can see how an extremely intelligent Narcissist or Antisocial person would answer such that they're healthy. Which is why psychologists use this as a screening tool, not as a diagnostic tool.

Perhaps the question should be, given all the problems of knowing yourself, or knowing yourself, but preferring the opposite since "opposites attract" leading to incorrect choices and wrong typing, the question should be this instead:

If you're in fact typed correctly, is the MBTI useful?  At least for me, it's extremely useful, because I can use my personality to accomplish what's most important to me, that's natural to who I am, without backlash.

When I try to solve things by being so fed up by my disorganization that I set up very rigid schedules and trying to organize my living space "to perfection", I end up being very critical of myself because I invariably fail and get overwhelmed.

Because of the failure and overwhelm, I get very grouchy and irritable, which leads to me becoming critical of others who aren't "pulling their weight" in terms of organizing and cleaning. Being critical and judgmental of others, as opposed to being accepting and open-minded, is one of the traits I hate the most about myself.

In MBTI/Jungian terms, this is my inferior Te function at work when I use it as my primary, ignoring my dominant and auxiliary functions that I use naturally (Fi and Ne). Forcing yourself to be something you're not almost always leads to disaster and/or is short-lived, because you can't be someone you're not.

On the flip side, if you find out that you're the opposite of me where you have extremely strong Te, using your Te dominant is the right thing to do, because you're good at it, and you use Te in a mature, healthy manner that's actually quite compelling and refreshing.

However, if I use my cognitive functions based on who I truly am, I tend to be very successful. For instance, when I was in a rut and every day's the same and there's a sense of dissatisfaction, I was able to come up with solutions.

One of my values (the jargon is Fi, introverted feeling at work) is to grow and be challenged, it makes sense to use my auxiliary Ne (extroverted intuition) to come up with possibilities and to think outside the box. I came up with Twitch streaming due to love of video games, and the extreme challenge of being entertaining (since I never had to use that skill), and wanting to create a warm, accepting community all fit my values (Fi) and what I found right to me based on my past experiences (Si).

Then, I use Te in the "right manner". Knowing that streaming fits my values and the challenge will jolt me out of the daily grind, I know I need a schedule, otherwise I would never stream. I set up a schedule, researched the in's and out's of streaming, finding practical ways to make streaming work for me.

The burn-out indeed came when I used my Te in the wrong way where I was results-oriented thinking about numbers. But renewed interest in streaming came about when I thought deeply about whether streaming is meaningful and fun. Does it make me happy, does it fit my values, and once I realize it has been helpful and rewarding, and ignore the number-driven results, I stopped being burned-out.

Another way in which knowing your personality type is seeing your blind-spots. I'm basically a slug, because I know myself very well. I know I'm 100% going to like something or not, so I close myself off to dreadful experiences such as going to frat parties, learning how to cook, learning how to garden, because I know 100% that these activities will lead to dread. 

However, using my auxiliary extroverted intuition (Ne) and being open to things, I force myself to do them because I see the value of experiencing these things, confirming what I already know, and using these experiences to laugh about with friends. 

As a complete introvert, I can go months without talking to my friends. This is a huge blind-spot and is definitely hurtful to others because they think, appropriately, that if you don't call them, you must hate them, don't value their friendship at all, and/or they did something wrong, even though that's far from the case. Strangely, I think about my friends all the time, but never call (talking on the phone makes me cringe), and I'm content to be alone for weeks on end.

As this causes clear problems in relationships, I use my inferior Te this week in fact, and actually set up a schedule to check my messages daily. I hate schedules, but this is meaningful to me, so it's been working. My daily activity list has things I want to do because they're meaningful to me and adds value to my life.

So I add things to that list such as making my bed. At night, I like the immediate gratification of crawling into sheet and blankets perfectly smoothed and evened out, distributing the warmth equally, as opposed to pulling the blankets on me, and ending up with clumps of warmth and cold spots. Since I highly value being comfortable, making my bed makes sense.

However, if you find that making your bed is a hassle, and you don't care about comfort, then do not make your bed, do not even waste your time thinking about it and feeling guilty about not doing so. In fact, there are scientific studies showing that making your bed may increase dust mites. Luckily, since I'm getting allergy shots, I've been making my bed so dust mites aren't going to cause problems.

Folding clothes adds no meaning to me, because it's just as easy to fish out the clothes I need, then spend hours folding. Further, the clothes are clean so it's not going to cause any sanitary problems if you don't fold. 

However, if you find organization truly soothes your soul and gives you peace of mind (clutter can be soul-sucking), and you love it when all your clothes are neatly hung up and in drawers, then by all means fold the laundry!

Washing dishes, vacuuming, steam mopping the floors, washing the bathrooms are a must for sanitary reasons.

Knowing who you are, and accepting who you are, you can find ways that lead to happiness, productivity and meaning. 

The MBTI/Jungian classification seems to be the one personality inventory that helped me figure this all out in a systematic, logical manner. As opposed to my having a hunch that being rigid doesn't work for me, but why not!, there must be something wrong with me, because it works for almost everyone else.

Indeed, American society operates this way, where being productive is to make sure you show up on time at work, follow the regimented schedule, and you find out if you're doing well if you get the results (this is very Te). So naturally, I think that if it works for the majority of Americans, it should work for me...but it never does.

Now knowing why using my Te (extroverted thinking) out of order is problematic, I know how to use my Te in the right order, thanks to understanding cognitive functions and stacking.

So it's very difficult to find your true MBTI type, unless you're very honest with yourself and insightful, but once you do, you see how it can be extremely helpful. But is it pseudo-science?

I'm not sure how to characterize the MBTI, except that at least for me (n=1), it's extremely accurate, and a very helpful therapeutic tool. Perhaps the MBTI is more philosophical in that it seeks to explain how you perceive and think about things. That doesn't mean that there's no truth and no value in MBTI. Just the opposite, it seems to be very accurate and honest. In fact, I found that the Taoist philosophy is in many ways more truthful than a lot of science. But, you can technically say that Taoism is a pseudo-science, because you can't really use experiments to prove if Taoism is scientific.

Everyone uses things that can't be proved by science, but nevertheless hold truths. Controversial topics such as people finding meaning and purpose in having faith and going to your place of worship for affirmation, love, support, interdependence, even though spiritual matters, can't be proved to be "correct" by science. And, controversy again, quite a few people find religion and spirituality "psuedo-science", which is the code, pejorative word for "bull-shit".

However, for a lot of people, having faith is not only extremely valuable but life-affirming, and leads to positive community building, lifting people out of depression, despair and despondency that can come from being disconnected.

Likewise, why throw MBTI out the window? For me at least, it's the personality system that not only makes the most sense to me, but also the most useful. I finally understand why I do the things I do in a systematic manner. As opposed to having a vague hunch about why I fail if I operate in the typical "American" results-driven way and berate myself as a result.

I can now leverage this concrete information to be a more productive and happy person, as opposed to using the cookie cutter method of "just be more organized" and "just do it" which would work for quite a lot of people, but not for me.

In fact, I was often critical of myself because of my procrastination and how I can't just plunge in and do the things that I need to do! Now I am better able to accept myself, and solve problems in a more cohesive and enduring manner.

Conclusion:
The question, "Is the MBTI Pseudo-science?" is the wrong question to ask. Rather, the question posed should be, "is it helpful?" If you manage to get consistent results even on the flawed online MBTI tests, knowing your cognitive function and stacking will help you to accept yourself, and find more cohesive and effective ways to solve problems based on how you operate.

The answer is yes, it has been helpful to me and many others, which is why MBTI still endures despite all the flack.

The How of Happiness Review

Am I An INFP? (Monday Musings 85)

The INFP Book by Catherine Chea

I became interested in the topic of Myers-Briggs (MBTI) when I was trying to figure out what techniques fit my personality the best, the past few weeks or so, to motivate myself to not procrastinate, as I noticed I was neglecting the blog. Of course, whenever you google personality types, the notorious MBTI personality inventory came up.

I was first introduced to Myers-Briggs as a senior in high school, when I was an immature teenager (18 years old) - I'm the very definition of a late bloomer - I may even still be blooming yet.

I was extremely pleased and elated that I was solidly an INFP because they were "so cool". One of the major characteristics is that "we're often misunderstood" recalling images of James Dean in Rebel Without a Cause. James Dean is a major icon of cool. Since I was nerdy and geeky, you can only imagine how happy I was.

Another major characteristic is that INFPs are "extremely creative" and best careers are in the writing and art fields. Never mind if you give me a blank piece of paper and tell me to write a story and draw, I would look back at you with the same blank expression. I'm so impressed with people who can create, and to be called creative was a huge compliment. 

I also was happy that we're supposed to be "emotional" because if anything, I'm as lethargic as my obese male cat, Fat Nyams, and often have a blank, glazed expression on my face. So it's nice that, per MBTI, I am emotional since INFPs "wear their hearts on their sleeves".

I was even more satisfied and smug because we're considered "the rarest type" (the INFJs are even rarer still) so that made me feel special - in American education, you feel the very opposite of special as you have to "fit in" with the structure and cliques.

Given my personality, I read all about INFPs and the part of having strong values rang true (of course, who doesn't have strong values), and felt that the description of INFP fit me so perfectly that it was uncanny. I was very satisfied with how I was one of the "awesome" rare fairies that are INFPs.

The MBTI came up in medical school when we all had to take personality tests as part of our "humanities" course where we learn about empathy, bedside manner and such. I came up as an INFJ and was confused, because I remembered how I was such a strong INFP back in high school, and personalities don't change. Your behaviors can change, but not your core personality.

For instance, if you're an introvert, you could never be an extrovert no matter how much effort. Eventually, forcing myself to be social exhausts me, and I have to go in hermit mode for days on end to recharge.

Being conscientious, I took the test again, and it came up as an INFJ. In medical school, we didn't have time to question and I left it at that. 

Flash forward to now, when I'm stable in my career and rather fortunate to have free time, I took the online MBTI tests (not the official). The first step was to read the description between INFP and INFJ.

I was hoping I'd be an INFJ because as a mature adult, the INFP description made me cringe.

First, they're described as being so sensitive that if someone says their hair looks like they didn't comb it, they'd ball up in a corner for days. And that INFPs have extreme meltdowns on a daily basis. I don't have those wild emotional mood swings at all. In fact, I've gotten even more placid as an adult. I just don't have the energy to get into rages.

Another extremely unflattering description is that INFPs seem like they can't get anything done and have difficulties finding a career, if they ever get a job in the first place. But I'm doing quite well in my career, and the medical and residency training was grueling and not considered "flaky".

Next, I took the online tests. I already know that I'm strongly INF,  that was never a doubt, so the question is the P vs. J. There were very conflicting results between INFP and INFJ and indeed a lot of mistypes exist between these two. There was a P vs J tester, and it would fall roughly 50/50. 

Because of this ambiguity, I did internet search and stumbled upon Casual Cognition as that was the first video that comes up when you type in INFP vs INFJ.

I didn't seem to be either INFP (Calypso, the owner) or INFJ (in this YouTube clip, though I'm more INFP-ish if I had to force myself to compare:



I was even more confused, until two pieces of the puzzle came together. The one question was "Do you consider yourself having the wisdom of a sage (INFJ), or the heart of a child (INFP)" and the answer was heart of a child, heart of a child, heart of a child.

Then Casual Cognition's section of micro-expressions clinched it - I definitely have the body and eye movements of an Ne (INFP).



Armed with this information, I read about the cognitive functions and stacking, which made it very clear that I'm an INFP. The descriptions of the personality types are of course stereotypes as there are variants (Monster Hunter World reference), but the preferences you have in the way you interact with the world remain stable.

Armed with all the above knowledge and research, I then read two books on the INFP, the first one was helpful as it was technical and described the concepts of cognitive functions and stacking.

Before reading this book, this video was difficult to understand, but then after, it made sense once you know the jargon. The part that made me chuckle is when I see Calypso with that glazed look on her face (very much me) and her partner, Alex, being so laser-focused and determined (she was very much into the discussion) that the juxtaposition was quite amusing:



The second book I read is the one I recommend if you want to know about INFPs. It was written by an INFP author herself and was so spot-on about my personality. It made me laugh at the end when she recommended that we do something that's outside of our comfort zone such as oral presentations. I ended up doing Twitch precisely for that reason, to do something new and challenging. Shortly after, she even mentioned how she joined Toastmaster's International.

Coincidentally, a month ago or so, I asked my best friend how can I improve my presentation in Twitch, and he mentioned that one of his best friends joins Toastmaster's International, and she really liked it, and that I should ask her about it and check it out.

It also made me cry near the end of the book as she wrote a letter of appreciation and affirmation to INFPs, since we're so critical of ourselves. Because our profile description makes it sound like we're pathetic and useless, INFPs tend to hate their personalities, and that's why we often mistype ourselves as other personalities. We want to be the golden retrievers, the doers, the inventors, the practical caregivers of the other personalities, but we fall in this category of being an idealist, being "true to ourselves" and "creative".

This book helped me to embrace who I am instead of trying to be someone who I'm not, and the exercises in self-compassion seem to be much smoother!

TL/DR: I admit that I'm an INFP!

The How of Happiness Review

Thinking Fast and Slow: Book Review (Monday Musings 84)

I heard about this book from one of my streamer friends after I mentioned how I don't think of myself as good at responding to unexpected things. I rarely think on my feet as well as I'd like. She'd heard about Thinking Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman and felt it might explain why some people can't respond quickly to surprises. Further, those types of people are more thoughtful, so I might not feel too bad about myself.

However, the book goes into different matters than what I hoped. Kahneman's thesis is that humans are not rational and how that was a huge breakthrough in the world of economics. This surprised me, because we all know that people do really stupid things, even the most rational among us...for example, we all know usually sensible people who don't wear helmets or seatbelts nor take other easy to implement safety precautionss.

Even so, the predominant tendency in economics for most of its existence as a science is to hold that people are rational and will do rational things. Kahneman proposes otherwise. He describes two systems that we use: System 1 is the immediate reaction we have to stimulus, our gut instinct. If we see an animal, we know right away that it's a dog, we don't have to think about it. Or, if we see smoke, we're know to try to put the fire out...or to flee.

While System 2 is your conscious mind, where you think things through. For instance, making a decision to buy one product rather than another. In a series of experiments, Kahneman shows that System 2 isn't always rational and thoughtful, but can be rather lazy. This can be very true, because we have to deal with a lot of issues in life, so that we can't spend that much energy carefully thinking through every decision and thought process. That would be too exhausting.

One experiment proving his thesis is the following problem: A ball and a bat costs $1.10, and the bat costs $1.00, how much does the ball cost?

I would immediately say "definitely not 10 cents" but only because I'm aware of these psychological experiments where the answer is often not what you think at first.

Even so, if I were a participant in this study, I would've answered, "Definitely not 10 cents, but I'm too tired to figure out the true cost of the ball". Most people answer 10 cents, because that's your impulse from System 1, and System 2 is too lazy to override the impulse.

As you can see from this example, your system 1 comes up immediately 10 cents, but your system 2 doesn't override this answer. The correct answer is 5 cents.

Kahneman also describes how system 2 is very biased - in one of many experiments he conducted, he showed how sentences in big bold letters are believed to be true more so than the same sentences in small lettering.

I found the first few chapters very interesting, and the experiments thought provoking. However, midway through the book, I couldn't get past the rest of the book because Kahneman gives so many thought experiments, it becomes tiring.

Indeed, the book appeared to be a monograph, where he would make a statement and then show examples to prove his theory. By answering all of the questions that he asks, I got fatigued.

As a result, I skipped the rest of the book to the conclusion. Because humans don't do things that are good for us, policies should allow for freedom of choice, but steer people toward the right thing to do.

For instance, employees are automatically opted in an IRA retirement savings plan at 10% of their salary. However, you can easily opt out of this plan if you want to.

Therefore, you have a choice to opt in or opt out. But with this policy, people may be too "lazy" to opt out, and unbeknownst to them, 10% goes into retirement fund. 10 years later, they will be surprised that it increased to a really nice sum.

Kahneman didn't mention this in his conclusion, but the conclusion I got from the book is to be open minded. We may think something is absolutely true, come to find out, we didn't realize that we were wrong all along, and never questioned it. By being open minded and nonjudgmental, your life will be more enriching. 

For instance, someone whom you had negative first impressions (System 1 making snap judgments), keep an open mind about that person, and you may find the person becoming your friend. Of course, if that person does awful things one after the other, then your first impressions were correct and System 2 will note to avoid that person. But this will be due to empirical evidence as opposed to a snap judgment.

It's easy to say people do dumb things all the time, but how do you explain why that's the case, and how do you prove it in a systematic way? In Thinking Fast and Slow, Kahneman does a superb job answering those questions, albeit in an eventually exhausting to read manner.

The How of Happiness Review

G Fuel Alternative (Monday Musings 83)

When I saw one of my friends stream, she mentioned that she was drinking G Fuel, and felt that it gave her very smooth energy, and no crashes after the effects wore off. She felt too jittery on the other energy drinks. Intrigued, I looked into G Fuel.

The ingredients aren't harmful because of the low dosages, but I hate the Sucralose and Acesulfame after taste, which G Fuel contains, and further, G Fuel is rather expensive at $35.99 for 40 servings, approximately $1 per serving, so I thought I can find a healthier and more cost-effective alternative to G Fuel.

After doing research, I found that the most effective way to improve energy and mental alertness is the tried and true, boring and effortful healthy ways such as:

1. Going to bed and getting up at the same time, i.e. good consistent sleep - most people need 8 hours
2. Exercising around 30 minutes between 55 to 85% (60% makes the most sense) of your max heart rate, at least 3 times/week, calculator here.
3. Fruits and vegetables - at least 5 servings - and whole grains
4. Reduce stress through meditation, problem-solving, and so forth
5. Smokers, QUIT!
6. Limit alcohol use 
7. Diaphragmatic breathing
8. Hydrate
9. Avoid sugars

However, there are going to be days when we can't get the 8 hours of solid sleep, eat nutritious foods, exercise, and smokers may slip due to increased stress and anxiety in their lives, and so on.

As streamers, should we then engage in performance drinks and pills, of which G Fuel is the most recently hyped, as marketing states that it was created by professional gamers? 

Reviewing the ingredients of G Fuel, the first part lists vitamins and minerals. However, it's much more cost-effective to take a generic multivitamin which is dirt cheap, and even free with some insurance plans. 

Even so, almost all research studies note that multivitamins don't really improve upon things and I recall my chemistry professor saying that multivitamins only lead to "expensive urine". So, unless you're literally not eating and at risk of scurvy, there's no need for multivitamins.

But, if you want to replicate G Fuel, you can take a cost-effective multivitamin for the first part of the ingredients.

The next ingredient of G-Fuel is the energy complex which consists of 140 to 150 mg of caffeine. Jet-alert caffeine at 100 mg is dirt cheap at $9.95 for 240 pills here at Amazon! You can take 1 and a half tablets (total 150 mg) for fraction of the G Fuel costs.

G-Fuel's other energy complex ingredients include, in addition to caffeine, Taurine, L-Citrulline Malate, Glucoronolactone, and N-Acetyl-Carnitine HCL. All these ingredients, including caffeine, are merely 1.7 grams.

Merely 1.7 grams, because to obtain the stimulating effects of Citrulline, you need on average 3 to 6 grams of L-Citrulline and 8 grams of Citrulline Malate! That's a lot! However, G-Fuel's concentration of Citrulline is well below the dosage needed for its effects (total of all ingredients at 1.7 grams).

Supplemental dosage of Glucoronolactone are between 500 to 3000 mg, so to be conservative, that's 0.5 grams minimum for this ingredient to be effective. Please note that G Fuel does not say how many mgs are included in their drinks, so I'm assuming they don't want to advertise the sub supplemental dosages. I'm assuming it'll be less than 0.5 grams.

Finally, N-Acetyl-Carnitine's recommended dosage to gain effects is 1500 to 2000 mg, and up to 4000 mg for depression.

Taking all these ingredients and breaking them down, the energy complex as to why G Fuel works is pure and simple Caffeine 140 to 150 mg. Again, Jet-alert is the cheaper and healthier alternative (i.e. no artificial sugars).

What can be said of the energy complex, the same can be said of G Fuel's focus complex. Again, total listed of the focus complex is a mere 1.2 grams. Like the energy complex, there's no breakdown of dosage of each ingredient in the focus complex. The ingredients here include L-Tyrosine, Choline Bitartrate, and ATP. ATP degrades through the digestion system, so ingesting ATP gets you nothing.

As for Choline Bitartrate, this study shows no acute benefits in healthy, young human adults - since we're using G Fuel for those immediate, acute effects, Choline Bitartrate does not appear to help in that situation. 

L-Tyrosine may be the only ingredient in G Fuel's energy complex that may have effects, even so L-Tyrosine had mixed results in reducing stress and improving focus. Some research showed benefits from taking L-Tyrosine, but at 500 to 2000 mg, but because there's no breakdown in G Fuel label, it's unclear if there's at least 500 mg of this ingredient in G Fuel, which I suspect is not the case. Again the total listed of all three ingredients is a mere 1.2 grams, and there's no breakdown for each ingredient!

Lastly, G Fuel notes the antioxidant complex, consisting of various fruit and vegetable powders and extracts, and given how many are listed, these might be in such small amounts that they don't have any effect. Indeed, they don't list how much of these powders are in the drink.

Let's pretend that G Fuel's combination does add up to having some antioxidant effects. You can quickly consume orange juice, or shove a handful of grapes or blueberries before stream, and have the same, or even higher antioxidant effects with less effort. No need to waste money and spend effort mixing your G Fuel powder and water!

Even so, the fact that G Fuel doesn't list how much powder and extract they use, most likely there's no antioxidant effects.

Therefore, after breaking down these ingredients, it appears that the effects of G Fuel on focus and mental energy are due to caffeine 150 mg and questionable multivitamin (per research studies). Again, you can get these extremely cheap or even free (multivitamin through insurance).

You may ask why my friend didn't feel jittery on G Fuel compared to other energy drinks? I'm suspecting it's because other energy drinks often include Guarana. G Fuel does not contain Guarana, and the other ingredients listed in G Fuel are such low dosages that you won't feel the effects except for caffeine. The combination of Guarana and caffeine in many energy drinks can make you feel jittery. I think in my case, it also caused heart racing.

The tried and true method in the above numbered list is the best way to improve energy and focus. However, if there's a day that you'll be streaming when you couldn't incorporate these healthy but boring strats, and you found G Fuel helpful, taking caffeine at 100 to 150 mg and a multivitamin will work the same. Not only that, this alternative is not only significantly cheaper than G Fuel, but healthier (no artificial sweeteners).

Conclusion: G Fuel is making a lot of money by brilliantly marketing popular Twitch streamers and professional gamers. However, you can get the same effects by taking cheap caffeine tablets (or drinking your favorite coffee beverage!) and any multivitamin. More effective yet, incorporate healthy life style changes. Don't believe the hype and save your dollars!

The How of Happiness Review

Shea Butter Variants (Monday Musings 82)

At the risk of sounding twee or like Maria Bamford's imitation of a high maintenance customer, nevertheless, I feel compelled to write about the various Shea butter types as it can help anyone with dry skin - though if you suffer from moderate to severe eczema, consult your dermatologist.

Growing up, I had extremely dry skin that during the winter months, my hands cracked with thin bleed lines. I wasn't surprised when I was diagnosed with eczema a couple of decades later.

My dermatologist recommended the extremely cost-effective petroleum jelly, i.e. Vaseline which works very well for my eczema, which is mild. I'm not sure how effective it is for those with more severe forms of eczema.

The only issue is that petroleum jelly feels horrible, so I dread taking a shower because it means putting on the Vaseline when I was initially compliant with my dermatologist's recommendation. Vaseline felt so bad that eventually I stopped using it. I'd rather deal with dry skin (only using Vaseline when I absolutely had to) then using it on a regular basis.

Because of my non-compliance with Vaseline, I had an eczema flair. Because I didn't want to use Vaseline for the rest of my life, I researched the alternatives. 100% raw and organic African Shea butter kept coming up as the best alternative, given the fact that it has antioxidants and known for its remarkable moisturizing powers - but it has to be raw to keep its healing properties, noted the many sources.

On Amazon, I was searching through raw organic Shea butters that are fair trade and has an expiration date, and I found two that met the description at the time. One of them, Amazon is no longer selling, so the second time, I bought the other brand.

The type of Shea Butter I initially bought was West African Shea butter, imported from Ghana. Because it's raw, therefore no processing, it's "clumpy" but if you warm it in your hands, it melts though there may be some smaller chunks as you apply, which is no big deal.

The feel is absolutely luxuriant, and my alligator skin felt almost like baby skin. My dermatologist even remarked how soft my skin was. In other words, the Western Shea butter works and feels better than Vaseline - not only does it feel better, but it feels wonderful. The only difference between the two is that after washing your hands 2 times you have to reapply the butter, whereas Vaseline, I only had to reapply after 4 hand washings, but that's not a problem at all.

African Shea butter is the clear winner over petroleum jelly, at least for dry to very dry/mild eczematous skin. I can't speak for moderate to severe eczema.

The issue with the West African Shea butter is that it has a rather strong odor, though once applied, the smell dissipates. However in time, it became unpleasant to me, that again, I was non-compliant. The first Shea butter expired (I probably only used it a dozen times), and same with the second Shea butter expiring, purely because of the smell. Albeit, after application, you don't smell it.

As this second Shea butter expired as well, as usual in Amazon searches, I stumbled upon an East African Shea butter (imported from Uganda) that is also 100% raw, organic and fair trade, with expiration date. This company noted that Eastern Shea butter has more nutrients than its Western counterpart, and also has a lighter smell and better absorption. Upon receiving this new Eastern variant, they were absolutely right about the much lighter smell. The smell was significantly more pleasant than the stronger smelling butter. 

This new Shea butter still has the smoky, buttery smell to it, but it's very mild, and didn't make me gag. I would say it's not pleasant but not unpleasant so I have no hesitation in slathering it on. Further, the fragrance disappears after application.

Upon application, the lovely East African Shea butter melted much easier with no clumps, and so much easier to apply as it absorbs much better than the Western variant. This is the first time that I no longer fear taking a shower (at risk of dry, itchy and painful skin) because this new Eastern Shea butter is so luxurious in feel and moisturizes phenomenally that I can take multiple showers a day and not be dry, as long as I apply this amazing butter.

However, I'm not sure about the claims that East African Shea butter is more nutrient-rich than the West African type. All I know is that experiencing both, the worse smelling one moisturizes equally well as the better smelling Shea butter. In other words, they both work equally well in moisturizing.

Both types are incredible, luxurious-feeling moisturizers - I just found the Eastern one more pleasant in smell and easier to apply.

Conclusion: You can't go wrong with either Shea Butters - though the East African Shea Butter originating from Uganda smells and applies better than the West African Shea Butter from Ghana.

The How of Happiness Review

Why You Should Allow Backseat Gaming (Monday Musings 81)

FuzzyJCats Twitch Channel

Almost all streamers I've met and have immense respect are really against backseat gaming, so this post is to explore reasons why you should reconsider.

I invite backseat gaming enthusiastically because I do need help in games and I don't care if someone says to watch out for x and y even if I'm aware of those particular issues, as well as for other reasons as will be explored below.

Albeit, I don't like story spoilers because other viewers may not know what happens in the end and you really don't want to spoil things. Unfortunately, I've made mistakes during stream where I inadvertently divulged which I then have to apologize.

Of course, I'm not talking about allowing toxic backseat gaming where your viewers are saying that you're a complete loser and waste of space because you missed a secret in game, or other hateful statements. 

Rather, I'm talking about the kind of backseat gaming when your viewers are very excited and enthusiastic about the game and offer tips and suggestions, which then spark a discussion in the community about best weapons, best builds and other gaming matters. This may lead to much needed conversational threads and sense of camaraderie amongst your viewers, since dead air is a death knell.

When new viewers come in and see friendly exchanges about the game in chat, they see that the stream is active and "not dead", and might even join in the lively conversation because they may feel compelled to put in their own two cents.

Now, if you're streaming just for the hobby and you don't care at all about viewers or streaming income, and you absolutely can't stand back seating, by all means, do prohibit it in your streams and ban/timeout anyone who doesn't follow your rules.

However, if you're interested in growing your channel and wanting to get some pocket money from your streaming endeavors, I would consider not just allowing backseat gaming, but perhaps even encouraging.

The key objection to backseat gaming is that it spoils the experience for you as a streamer, but the point is, you're streaming for your audience, not for yourself! Recall that streaming is a form of entertainment.

Another reason is that subconsciously, the streamer wants to figure things out which will make them seem clever to the community to stroke your own ego, but who cares? I found by listening and understanding others (rather than trying to impress by seeming clever and accomplished), people have found me "fun".

I'm emphatically not being a home body, but because I spend hours asking questions about their favorite subjects, such as their children (even as my eyes glaze over, I hate to admit), they enjoy talking to me.

That's not to compliment myself, because the reality is, people want to be seen and heard, and if you give them the platform, they find you absolutely charming.

Next time at a party of strangers, just listen and ask pertinent questions, that person will find you riveting and will talk to you for hours if you let them - they will never make a questionable excuse that they have to go home and feed their cats. Don't be surprised if that person tells their friend that they would like to get to know you better.

Why do people backseat game? There are many reasons, but the main one is because they're very enthusiastic about the game and want to show how much they know, as people want to be seen as intelligent, knowledgeable and helpful, even as backseat gaming grates on almost everyone's nerves. People love to show off and/or share their knowledge and expertise.

Next, what is the purpose of entertaining an audience, of which streaming is a form? People engage in entertainment to have fun and feel good. What better way to do that by allowing your audience to actively participate, and hence feeling good about themselves for being smart, helpful and capable!

Often, when I ask my community what to do in a particular situation or how to get to a certain location due to my horrific sense of directions, they always give me superb advice which adds to chat content.

By telling your viewers how helpful and intelligent they are - and you're not lying because they are exceedingly astute since they also play these games, often spending hundreds to thousands of hours - they feel good about themselves and a sense of accomplishment. Though I think I exhausted some of my viewers when they were giving me directions, so perhaps something I have to dial down in the future. But in general, viewers do enjoy being seen as smart.

The exciting thing is that through the power of backseat gaming, my community literally pushed me through half of Borderlands 2, which is no small feat, given I never succeeded in any FPS! At that time, I could complete Borderlands 2 but it was too mentally exhausting for me to stream since I was inexperienced. Even so, I know I can beat the game off-stream (or even while streaming when I gain more experience) thanks to my lovely community.

The other good thing about allowing backseat gaming is that no one likes to follow rules - freedom here is the key - so if you have a long list of don'ts, it can led to a sense of suffocation. Then there's the inevitable backlash where they do exactly what you don't want them too.

So often, when you hear someone say "Whatever you do, don't touch that",  you're going to want to touch said offensive object, even if in one million years, you'd never think of touching it.

As for objections, I'm sure streamers feel that if they allow backseat gaming, everyone will tell the streamer what to do and the chat will be a chaotic mess. This is actually good since Twitch specifically looks for engaged and active chats! This is Partnership material!

However, don't get excited, because the reverse is true. There are times when I'm practically begging chat to help me find a way, but because they're used to the general etiquette of backseat gaming = bad, they only relent after quite a lengthy period of time, when I'm tearing out my hair.

The other objection I can see is that other viewers might be annoyed with the advice and tips, but at the same time, they can ignore reading the chat comments. They're not forced to be glued to their seats, eyes trained on your chat box.

However, if your community is reasonable, another one of your viewers (maybe a new one) will invariably chime in that there is yet another way to get there, as well as tease you for bad sense of directions. The dialogue tends to go into other intricacies of the game that foster further comments, which is a must if you want to obtain partnership.

Another reasonable objection is that by stumbling about and the community seeing you figure out things your own way could be entertaining, so backseat gaming will prevent that. Again, because the ethos is backseat gaming = bad, even as I'm encouraging my chat to tell me what to do, crickets are chirping until I flounder for up to 30 minutes, maybe for even longer.

Even so, you can thank the viewer and mention that's very smart, but then mention, you'll try it this other way. This is where you can be clever, by finding another solution then what is recommended, in effect showing off your creativity!

The last objection I can think of is what if your viewers are toxic about backseat gaming? Well, timeout or ban said viewer, exactly as you do for any other type of toxic comments on chat, whether it's bigoted remarks, insulting others, or what not.

I can't think of any further issues or problems in empowering your community to give out advice and tips, only positive ones.

What about you? Do you agree, or do you see pitfalls?

The How of Happiness Review

How to Beat the Backloggery Boss! (Monday Musings 79)

The Backloggery is an amazing site where you can add your entire game collection, and see which games you've beaten, and which needs completion. It's frustrating to see so many games not yet beaten, and this site gives you incentives to slay the Backloggery Boss. Indeed, it's a breath of fresh air when you see your backlog numbers reducing, and you also obtain achievement badges, which is a very nice touch!

They also have features that shows you trends of your backlog against games completed. Upon using these cheese strats, my unbeaten games percentages plummeted! I can't find a link on the site where it lists all of your badges in one place, so I'll make that suggestion!

If you find it very useful, make sure you chose a name that you really want, since you can't change your username as of this writing.

TheBackloggery Trends Chart

Here's my Backloggery link.

I love the site because it's so easy to add, edit and view games, so impressed that I donated to the site awhile back. You can easily add games under a Collection Series, which streamlines, so you can view games even more conveniently.

Given that I have a large backlog (when I started, it was over 100 games), and I felt overwhelmed, but digging into my usual ways of finding cheese methods to beat a boss, I found ways you can cheese and defeat the Backloggery Boss!

I would sell, give away and/or donate all physical copies of games that you never played and really feel that you'll never play again. Don't be upset about giving up these games, for you can borrow those games back from library, or rent from GameFly (my review link) which thus far I had a surprisingly positive experience.

By donating and giving my games away, my backlog was heavily reduced by at least 50%, and I got a nice tax deduction! This is a win-win - you no longer have the guilt of an unplayed game, and by selling or donating, you get money back, and someone out there is enjoying your game so it doesn't go to waste. Through donation and giving away strat, that takes out 50% off Backloggery's health.

I wouldn't include any free games you've gotten through your Playstation or XBox subscription, since there's no "guilt" if you never play those games ever again, since they're free anyways. I also wouldn't include games that you received free in a bundled console package, because often you buy these bundled packages because they're actually cheaper than the console by itself.

Therefore, delete those free games, unless you want to include them as a reminder that this is a game you want to play down the road. On the other hand, if you need a reminder that you own a game, you most likely aren't interested in playing the game in the first place!

Next, I was very upset since I purchased a lot of digital copies of games and DLCs which comprised a substantial portion of my backlog. Upon reviewing The Backloggery FAQ section, it was noted how ownership is unclear, especially since a lot of games are purchased digitally. I was then excited, after reviewing legal rules into digital ownership, that we do not technically own these games at all!

Therefore, I deleted all the digital games I purchased that I don't intend to ever play again! Digital copies also include any DLCs you purchased as well! Often, when I buy DLCs, I already finished the game, and would start on the next, never going back to playing said DLC. Therefore, you can also delete those if you know for sure that you'll never go back to those neglected digital games and DLCs. 

I can't tell you how refreshing that is, since quite a few digital games I purchased tend to be classic platform games, which I tend not to enjoy as much as RPGs, as well as iOS games that may not work on the next iPhone iteration (further, I refuse to buy any more Apple products due to atrocious customer service x 2), and hence will never play those.

Thankfully, Fortnite's Save the World was digital, so I can delete that game. Further, is this a finished game in the first place? I don't think Epic games ever completed it, instead focusing on Battle Royale, so there's no cheating here.

Make sure you label games that don't have an ending (such as Karaoke and Dance games), by labeling them as "Null", which will show up on your games collection list, but not counted toward your backlog. 

By removing the vast amount of digital games and DLCs, that left my Backloggery boss near death at 4.9% health. The remaining 6 games are physical copies that I can easily donate. I'm so tempted to give away or donate Witcher 3 as I don't foresee myself playing the game, given that it's been years since I was thinking of buying it, and then once it was on a huge discount, I purchased it, and yet only played at most 30 minutes! 

The remaining physical games I have are definitely games I will play which include only five, all on PS4: Final Fantasy X/X-2 Remake, Gravity Rush Remastered, Kingdom Hearts 3, Nier: Automata, and Nights of Azure 2.

With my strat of using GameFly, I will be renting games, and only buying a game that I want to play more in depth such as Sekiro. This will prevent the Backloggery Boss from resuscitating.

Clearly these strats are very cheese (which is how I tend to play games), but it works and isn't technically cheating!

Do you find these strats helpful or too cheese, and do you find it refreshing when you reduce your backlog?

The How of Happiness Review

Sekiro: Initial Impressions (Monday Musings 78)

Thanks to GameFly free month trial, I was able to try out Sekiro for free. I'm using the service

Sekiro hero, Wolf

to sample games that I want to buy down the road. Games that may take me months to finish such as the typically long JRPGs, thus I only played Sekiro for about 20 hours or so, then mailed it, in exchange for the next game.

A major first tip that I'd recommend is to change the controls for the D-pad up = switch between your prosthetic tools, and Y/Triangle button = use items. It's a bit clunky to press D-pad up when you want to heal as opposed to a face button.

Spoilers Ahead!

I don't think I'd be so enamoured of Sekiro if it didn't have the incredible melee combat mechanics. It's very addictive to deflect (parry) which breaks the enemy's posture, and once posture bar is completely filled (i.e. you broke enemy posture), then deathblow. Another major way to kill off enemies (if you refuse to deflect), is to deplete health bar through R1/RB attack, and when it goes to zero, you press RB/R1 for death blow. Stealth is another way.

But often, it's much faster to use the deflect mechanic, which breaks posture, and once posture is broken, you instantly kill the enemy with R1/RB attack. And, the developer, From Software insist that you use deflect.

Because of this insistence, or rather fetish, I wonder if I would get tired of deflecting, and then bored of the game eventually. On the other hand, 20 hours of practice is not enough time to be able to consistently deflect, so I'm hoping that even a hundred hours later, you still need to hone your deflect skills, so that combat doesn't get stale.

It's upsetting that you are forced to play the way From Software wants you to play, as opposed to fighting the enemies the way you want to. I thought From's other game Bloodborne was very limiting, as you have to defeat enemies mainly through melee, but at least there were variety of weapons with different feels, and the weapon transform is a neat trick. Sekiro is even more limited than that. From my understanding, Sekiro's main character Wolf only has that short Katana, so your strikes will always feel the same.

Like Bloodborne, you really can't make a pure ranged build in Sekiro, and in fact, the only ranged option I noticed so far is the Shuriken prosthetic tool, of which you can only use a dozen times (though you can buy skills to increase the usage). The mantra (pun intended due to the Buddhist themes of this game) we will be repeating is deflect, deflect, deflect, but using the same boring looking weapon.

However, I was very stubborn and as a middle finger to From, I played the game the way I want to play. So, for the first few mini-bosses and the two main bosses (Lady Butterfly and the rather awful General on Horse boss), I got away with running away from them when they attack. After attack, I run back towards the enemy, whacking them once or twice. One particular whirling move (which appears to be resistant to deflect or special deflect skill called Mikiri) of Lady Butterfly, I found I couldn't run away, because I often get clipped, but found you can jump safely away from that attack.

For Lady Butterfly's phase 2, I used the prosthetic wooden axe, with the additional prosthetic combo skill that I grinded for, to stun-lock her to death, in a surprisingly easy cheese method.

As for trash mobs, I run away from enemies (Wolf has unlimited stamina), picking up items and stumbling upon the next shrine (save point). But since you can easily be swarmed by trash mob, it's best to take them out via stealth. If you whiff on stealth, because quite often, when you successfully sneak up on the enemy and press L1/LB for the backstab, that attack doesn't register, and then you alarm all of his buddies.

Inconsistently, other times, the backstab reflects (even without that red icon that means death blow). The inconsistency of stealth is a bit of a let-down, especially as stealth kills are a good way to thin out the ranks.

Once stealth whiffs, however, you're sort of forced into using the deflect method because there are so many enemies that you have to take them out very fast, and the fastest way is through the deflect/counter-attack method that Sekiro fetishizes.

I'm absolutely certain that down the road, you really have to master deflect (as well as the other special deflect skill that you can grind for, Mikiri, that breaks posture even more), so I hope the game doesn't get stale the further you progress.

Again, I don't think the game would be as stale if only Wolf can use other weapons that may have slower but stronger attacks and the like!  Of course From software can continue the deflect mechanic all they want, but at least give us variety in weapons. In fact, I got excited when you can buy a hint from an NPC for a short sword (of course my heart sank, since you want a longer ranged sword), but at least it's not that same Katana. Come to find out, this sword was a prosthetic tool to my chagrin.

I wonder if the stellar combat mechanics can override all the issues I have of the game? However, before I go into the rather problematic flaws of the game, I must say that out of all the From software games post-Demon's Souls, Sekiro has the most satisfying melee combat.

The first grating issue I have is that the un-inspired looking hero Wolf has just as much personality as a blank-slate character, so it didn't make sense to not have the hero customizable.  Also I wished you can change outfits, as it got tiring, even after just 20 hours, of seeing the same bland costume. Perhaps Activision may roll out costumes as micro-transactions.

At any rate, if you're going to have a character that's not customizable, please make him or her distinct such as Nathan Drake of Uncharted or Joel and Ellie of The Last of Us! As From software appears to be allergic to good writing, and committed to no personality playable characters, their heroes should be customizable. If you want the character to talk, just hire male and female voice actors.

Again, it's not as if Japan has lack of brilliant writers, so why can't From software hire a good writer? There are so many starving writers in the world who would jump at the chance to make 200K for a game script.

I harp on this issue because indeed, the story and the other NPCs you meet are equally as bland to the point where I didn't feel anything when I found out that the castle was burned down in one of Wolf's memories. In fact, I was actually annoyed that I couldn't go through the fire to the next destination as a faster way of getting to the boss, very clearly not caring about the castle's destruction, but more concerned about traversal. Adding to my annoyance is that you had to go around to the right of your mentor, even though he said to go to his left.

So, we're stuck with the same dull looking character throughout the game, same damn armor and weapon, and at least in the beginning part of the game, we have uninteresting NPCs and un-inspired story. Fine, but the combat and traversal are amazing, and the graphics lovely with almost no aliasing, so I pushed through. 

The world is gorgeous, and I find the level design rather good! After using stealth and learning how to deflect better, I was able to clear out some areas to explore. There were some spots that I missed because of the verticality of the game - the traversal is wonderful as you can use grappling hook to move seamlessly through the world - as there's an item that's often hidden just below, or above you.

There are also the typical From software doors that don't open on the accessible side, or needing key, and there were two doors that I couldn't find my way to the other side! Although I wanted to play the first part of the game blind, I just had to find out how to open these doors, so I Youtube'd it. These hidden doors showcase the great level design of the game, as one door (after the Ogre mini-boss), you have to go past that area, go through a cave, climb multiple ledges, and you still can miss an upper ledge that you can grapple hook your way up, and open this door.

Even so, the issue with having a great level design, but only useless consumable items to pick up (you can easily buy or grind for them), you're not inspired to really get to know the map and the world of the game. The only items that are useful (at least in the beginning part of the game) are the prosthetic tools - and they're very easily found because they tend to be before or after the shrine save points - or you can buy them. So that doesn't compel you to explore the world for them.

The other item that is a must is the gourd seed - analogous to the estus flask - that heals you. The more seeds you collect, the more heals you can use, and they replenish every time you rest at the shrines. But these seeds are also easily seen either before or after the shrine save points, again making exploration unnecessary.

Another one is the prayer bead which you get when you defeat mini-boss and I think main boss. You need 4 to make a prayer bracelet that increases vitality. I didn't realize that you can find a prayer bead in tucked off location, but even so, there are so many mini-bosses, that I didn't find it necessary to scour the world to find 1 or 2 prayer beads, unless for trophy.

This is in contrast with Souls games, where you want to explore every part of the world because you may find cool weapons and armor that are in hidden locations, but this is not quite the case with Sekiro. But at least Sekiro seems to have complex level design and fun traversal, though you may not have as much fun exploring after getting the five trillionth ash.

At least for the first part of the game, the music was really bad. The trash mob background music was so off-putting that I turned music off. This was a shock to me as all the Souls game had incredible music. I didn't listen to the boss music of Lady Butterfly or the General on the Horse boss because I forgot to turn the music back on.

The first boss I encountered was Lady Butterfly in the Memories, and I failed horribly against her, so I decided to continue the main campaign, getting more skills, prayer beads, and Gourd seeds. But if I hadn't encountered Lady Butterfly, I would be so disappointed because the first proper boss of the game was quite bad - I feel that the General on the Horse is probably my least favorite boss in all of From's software games I played.

However, Lady Butterfly was a fantastic boss, and was very happy to cheese her in her second phase, and fighting her the way I wanted to fight her. I'm predicting that future bosses are going to be wonderful, as is the From Software trademark.

I didn't mind the lack of variety of enemies, since again, the combat is so amazing. Further, the various human enemies all have distinct attack patterns, which is a big strength of this game, so you have to be able to know when to deflect or Mikiri for a particular human.

It appears that Sekiro is not intended to be the typical JRPG that we've seen in Souls series, but more along the lines of an action-adventure game, since it greatly scales down the usual stats of Vitality, Stamina, Dexterity, Strength and so forth, but rather you level up via Prayer Beads (as mentioned above, 4 of them grant you 1 extra vitality) and upon killing bosses, I believe my attack power increased by 1. Even so, you do buy skills, and prosthetic tools also can be leveled up.

Although I love the min/max and distributing points as in the traditional JRPG, as opposed to skill trees, I completely understand why a lot of people prefer pure combat and not having to worry about leveling up. In that sense, Sekiro's combat is spectacular, and gameplay is where the game truly shines, as it makes you perfect your timing and skills, so satisfying to break posture upon deflect/counter-attack.

Conclusion: Despite all my complaints, my initial impression is that I like Sekiro because of the thrill of combat, which is breathtaking at times. I also appreciate the level design (albeit wasted due to uninspired items you find), the traversal, and stealth mechanics (although often dodgy). 

I'll have to play the entire game to see if I truly love the game, to see if combat can push Sekiro past all the issues I have. It's a game that I may not want to buy at full price, but certainly when it comes out with the bundled DLC edition, at cheaper price. If you played Sekiro, what are your thoughts of the game?

The How of Happiness Review